I love a good ham and Argenti Swiss on rye.
Wear this watch: if you would kill for a Reuben right about now.
Don't wear this watch: if you're more of a cheddar guy.
In 99% of uses, this watch doesn't: come with a side of sweet potato fries.
The contagious disease named after this watch is: Swissilis
Legend has it that when the moon is full, this watch transforms into: a vegan.